Whether we like it or not, we all need to get stuff done around the house (ok, maybe if you're a billionaire you have a staff to do these things, but then you'd have to manage the staff, right?). Sometimes one of the best things about knowing the way you naturally take action is that you can make annoying stuff (like chores) less annoying. You might even be able to make them fun - because when you get stuff done, the joy of finishing them is pretty fun.
Some of you may like a neat and tidy home, while others of you actually need it in order to relax. When it comes to less-routine projects, like fixing the towel rack or painting the bedroom, many issues can be at play (time, money, motivation, etc.). Either way, somebody has to do the work and when things don't get done... or aren't done the way YOU would do them, it can be a source of conflict. Many times, this becomes habitual (or not) and isn't driven by your conative MO.
There are many instances where someone is naturally suited to get things done, but they use that particular energy all day at work and don't have any of it left over for housework (think of the plumber who never fixes his own leaky sink). We will look at how your instinctive MOs will drive the way you do chores when you're striving. In particular, we're going to look at how your approaches to dealing with systems and organization (Follow Thru) and handling physical space and tools affect the way you maintain your home.
Kyle, you keep things "just so" - making sure that things are put away properly, following the recipes when you cook (using only the best ingredients), and maintaining the house when it needs it. You add comfort, security and long-term quality to your home. You're also handy when you do a project, making sure it's planned out and built well.
Kathy, your natural need to prioritize will help you make sure to tackle the most important things first , but you'll do your best when you have a deadline - like a dinner party or event. Take the time to do your homework for more involved projects, and always get a few contractor estimates when necessary.
Kyle, you know Kathy may not finish the task or project she just started, so if you really want it done, you might want to prepare yourself for stepping up to finish it off yourself. You also might want to help with the logistics so the two of you have the necessary materials and supplies. Kathy, you ought to be aware and thankful that Kyle accommodates your somewhat haphazard approach. Not everyone is so lucky.
Neither of you is a natural planner and organizer but Kyle, you're the best suited for these household duties. Try to find resources to help you with this. Other people (friends, family, internet communities . . .) have put together plans and checklists you can customize and use. It may help you to use timers, apps and reminders on your phone to do things like picking up the dry-cleaning, taking the trash to the curb, etc. And the two of you may need to work a little more than others to figure out which chores really do have to get finished on time so you can use your energy wisely - you'd better be done with the roof repairs before it starts raining!
You do know you guys are different when it comes to working with your hands, right? Kyle, you're the builder, maker, constructor. Kathy, you aren't. And I hope nobody expects you to be. It's not that you can't build things, it's that you aren't the person who should spend your time doing it and what's "good enough" to you probably won't be to Kyle. So Kyle, take the lead in doing the household repairs and building projects while Kathy is doing the other things around the house that need to get done.
And appreciate each other. You'll make a great team as long as you're using your respective talents and valuing each other's contributions. That doesn't mean Kathy has to have hammer and wrench in hand while Kyle is working on the plumbing. It means if you're going to both work on that project (and do you really have to?) that perhaps Kathy should buy the supplies and get the materials Kyle needs before he is doing the actual plumbing work.